I stand here,
a solitary figure alone in this world,
if only for a moment as time goes.
the sky above me dark as indigo,
the mountains behind me like purple fortresses.
I soak in the fading light as the sun slowly sinks
into the embrace of the horizon and I think,
what I wouldn’t give to be like the sun,
to sink into your arms. . .
sleep in your embrace. . .
The wind, my only companion, whispers to me
“he will come. . .” it says,
“be patient. . .” it begs.
I cannot help but be longing
for that which eludes me.
The love I have longed for,
the soul I have searched for, dreamed of.
The sky is slowly melting into a prism of color,
reaching across the jagged horizon
fading from dark indigo to a deep red.
Like I would like to melt in your arms
taking eternity together.
Why is it I who must wait for this,
this love I live for?
It seems like a never-ending road,
paved only by my loneliness . . .
This journey for the one,
the one who would love me as I would him.
Oh, to be rid of this painful desire,
to live without emotion,
but how can I?
When there is a chaos of feelings within,
when I would rather die young,
then never feel anything at all.
So I take with me deep within my heart
knowledge that he exists,
that you exist.
Knowing that he waits for me,
that you wait and dream of me as well.
I wait for you,
building a wall or mountains, as you will,
to protect my crystalline soul,
until he comes forth to siege my lonely heart.
317 Fortress [22 June 2000]
I stand here,