I feel lost
the world crashing in upon me
no one there
to catch me as I fall
I’m alone
like that’s anything new
all I feel like doing is sleeping
chasing reality away
with the happiness in my dreams
closing my eyes to the light of day
and opening them to the brightness
of my dreams
I’m so lost. . .
daily my heart feeds its pet Hope
believing that one day
Hope will grow into a reality
reality being him. . .
the man who would take me in
chase all the darkness away
enclose me in the peace of his arms
but alas
each day Hope dies a little
it crawls back into its cage
and I crawl into my lonely bed
to dream, maybe,
to lay awake, tears flowing freely
as pain grabs ahold of my heart, my soul
when the loneliness sets in
I’ve been seeking him for so long
that it seems like an eternity
I seek to be loved
once by someone who doesn’t have to
loved by him in all things
not because I’m family or friend
but because I am me
because he wants to
that’s all I ask for. . .
is that too much?

© Johanna Fugitt 2017