422 Can I Stay in My Dreams? [25 September 2001]

could I just stay here
asleep, in dreams,
where life is behind me
and love is around me
where loneliness does not hurt me
and my cravings for touch are fed
can I just stay here
in this dream
where this man wishes me
to stay around him
where I don’t feel
like an intruder
a freak
a fool
to believe that anyone
actually wants me around
is despair supposed to color my life
with this deepening darkness
where I can’t see?
where’s the one that
I don’t have to keep secrets from?
where anything I tell him
he’ll still love me
do I deserve this?
haven’t I been through
enough shit already?
growing up a freak show
for all those laughing
when I walk by
no one knows
or would want to know
they brush me off
like lint from their shoulder
so can I just stay here?
in this dream forever?
without tears staining my face
without fears filling my heart
where his arms encompass me
in his protective embrace
and keep me safe from this world
or am I doomed
to never find it
to never find my way
always lost
never found


© Johanna Fugitt 2017

About taikodragonjkf

Member of Spokane Taiko. Poet. Karaoke singer. Love cats and baseball.
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