436 Since You’ve Been Gone [10 December 2001]

I’ve been lost
and found
since you’ve been gone
I stand upon my two feet
living my life as I should
where I look
I can’t see any darkness
maybe a little there on the horizon
the place I visit
when I’m just laying down to sleep
but there are blue skies above
storm clouds always ready
to strike lightning when I’m angry
ready to bring sustenance to a hungry landscape
the landscape of my mind
to rain down peace
and solidarity
to call out ear drum shattering thunder
when desire awakens within me
but the air is always clean
though some thoughts not so
especially those about the males
of my species (evil snickering)
I am happy
I have come out of my shell
since you’ve been gone
for the better I know
too bad you aren’t here
to share that with me
I love you still
and always will
I want you in my life
but I don’t need you
so love me as I am
accept me with my quirks
and I’ll be here waiting for you
when you return
so when you ask upon your arrival
what I did
while you were away
I can say this
“Since you’ve been gone,
I’ve found myself.”

© Johanna Fugitt 2017

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